ATLANTA — The Atlanta Falcons were slapped with a $250,000 fine this week after defensive coordinator Jeff Ulbrich’s 21-year-old son Jax decided the NFL Draft was the perfect stage for prank phone calls. Jax allegedly contacted Shedeur Sanders moments before his name was called and informed him he’d been drafted by “Arby’s Corporate Flag Football League.”
NFL officials said the prank call violated league policy on confidentiality and basic human decency. The call, placed using a burner phone named “DraftBuster 3000,” included a fake trade scenario involving three punters, an expired coupon, and a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos. Sources say Sanders politely hung up after screaming into a couch pillow.
Ulbrich was fined $100,000 for failing to secure sensitive draft materials or, at minimum, parent responsibly. League investigators discovered Jax had been attending pre-draft meetings under the disguise of a protein shake. Falcons staff said they assumed he was “some kind of new analytics intern with vibes.”
The Falcons released a statement saying they “accept the league’s punishment” and have already enrolled Jax in a program called “Grown-Up Decisions for Former Vine Stars.” They also confirmed all future communication devices would be secured in a vault guarded by an angry kicker named Mitch.
Shedeur Sanders has reportedly forgiven the team but noted that being fake-drafted by a prankster is somehow still less humiliating than being selected by the Chicago Bears. Meanwhile, the NFL is reviewing new protocols to prevent prank-related draft interference, including background checks for anyone who owns a ring light and has ever said, “What’s up, YouTube?” At press time, Jax was allegedly launching a podcast called Oops, I Pranked a Franchise, featuring next week’s guest: Roger Goodell’s voicemail.
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