ST. PAUL, MN — Local woman Karen Duley, 38, was “mildly unsettled” Wednesday after noticing her reflection blinking several beats behind her, creating what authorities described as a “minor and charming mirror quirk” rather than a metaphysical breakdown or doorway to Hell. Officials declined to investigate further after the reflection winked suggestively.
Duley first noticed the delay while brushing her teeth, though she admitted it might’ve been happening for years. “It’s like she—me—doesn’t want to keep up anymore,” she told reporters, staring at her bathroom mirror, which allegedly has not apologized. Her cat reportedly refused to enter the bathroom after the event, but that is not legally relevant.
Police responded after a neighbor called 911, reporting “prolonged whispering in the mirror.” Officer Dennis Hurley confirmed the mirror blinked “a bit behind,” but noted it was “not enough to call in a priest or anything.” Hurley added, “Mirrors get weird sometimes, especially when they’re bored. I’m not trained for haunted stuff, just irregular blinks.”
When reached for comment, the reflection smirked and mouthed something inaudible, possibly “soon.” Authorities are urging the public not to panic unless their own reflections begin breaking character or developing independent hobbies. “It’s nothing,” said Hurley, shortly before requesting to transfer to traffic duty.
Local clergy declined to comment, citing a sudden vacation. In yet another development absolutely no one could’ve seen coming, Duley has reportedly begun covering the mirror with a blanket each night and refers to it only as “Her.” As of Thursday, the mirror has not attempted any further gestures, though the houseplants have started leaning toward it. Police advise residents to maintain eye contact with their reflections but avoid discussing future plans, secrets, or dreams.
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